Here, Let Me Judge That for You…

by Cindy on November 10, 2010

This post was first published in November, 2010. Based on some recent emails I’ve received, I think it would be beneficial to repost it from time to time for the new folks. Thank you for your patience if you’ve already read it.

In my musings about this home life I’m living, I often say things that other women view as “judgmental”. I explain that my being at home instead of in the “real world” is a perfectly viable vocation, even should my husband die, and I’m called to the mat for “judging” women who work outside the home. I mention that some people probably shouldn’t homeschool, and I’m castigated for judging unschoolers, of all things! If I were to say that I prefer the white meat of the bird, someone is probably going to accuse me of hating people who prefer the thigh. It’s a risk you take when you talk to yourself in public. I’m prepared for that, and often amused by it.

I love my commenters. Need you, in fact! I love those who agree, and those who disagree. But there is one kind of commenter that I just can’t stand. It’s the commenter who thinks that her (or his, I suppose) situation should be my primary consideration, no matter what the topic. Of course, I have no way of even knowing the situations of my readers. As this is the internet, and I am basically addressing everyone on the planet who happens to click over thisaway, it is ridiculous in the extreme for anyone to take my postings personally. This is about as impersonal as it gets!

I suppose that, in the sense that I base my decisions on my own judgment, then I am indeed being judgmental. But I’m not judging you, dear reader. I am weighing options and judging consequences. If you want me to judge you, shoot me an email with all your details, and I’ll play Dr. Laura for you. Otherwise, please don’t hit up my comments with your pleas of “stop judging me!”. Because I am not. I don’t even know you. (If I do know you, then you can rest assured that I think you’re fine. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t seem to be doing a better job than me at practically everything.)

I am not your master. I’m not a preacher or a spiritual leader of any kind. I don’t wish to tell you what is best for you. You’ll answer to someone besides me on Judgment Day, and if your conscience is clear, you don’t need to fear what a little hillbilly in Appalachia thinks of you.

I do, however, have reasons for doing the things I do, and those reasons amount to judgments. If you don’t like those judgments, feel free to disagree, but from now on, comments that focus on my attitude (which is not the problem), rather than the merits of the discussion will be ignored. Or maybe even deleted, depending on whether I judge your comment to be trollish.

That is all.


Twitter: firefam5
November 24, 2010 at 5:01 pm

Ahh Cindy- You make me laugh. I get that same response even from my own family. Go figure. We just blog about the world through our eyes. Obviously others will see it differently- they have different eyes & circumstances. Not personal on our end- just how we are navigating through life. Not sure what possesses one to challenge the thoughts one another’s blog. It’s one thing to post a comment- quite another to start an argument :) I feel ya-

Amanda (the sister)
Twitter: RamandaHarvey
November 27, 2010 at 8:12 am

Here here!

Cindy November 27, 2010 at 9:24 am

You know, Gina, I don’t even mind a good argument. If it’s done with a sincere spirit, I enjoy the back and forth. It’s when a commenter runs right past addressing what she thinks is wrong with my post (usually because she failed to get the point) and makes it all about some imaginary sin I’ve committed against her or her ideals. I can handle people thinking I’m wrong, but I can not *abide* people hijacking my comments to air their wittle hurt feelings. Get a therapist, already!

Amanda (the sister)
Twitter: RamandaHarvey
November 28, 2010 at 12:17 am

No, no–Here, Here. As in Come Here :) You’re right, though…it’s been a long weekend. So, Hear, Hear!

Kela July 11, 2011 at 3:17 pm

This post deserve its own button for anyone else to use it…sorta like a “my site, my right” kinda thing! haha!

Cindy July 11, 2011 at 3:34 pm

I shall ask Honey (my graphics gal) to draw me one up immejately! LOL

Twitter: meghantucker
July 11, 2011 at 3:46 pm

Word :)

Steph @ MomKaboodle
Twitter: momkaboodle
November 1, 2011 at 11:31 pm

Stop judging me!

Haha, just kidding. Laughing fiendishly over the “addressing the entire planet” (seriously!) and emailing you so you can Dr Laura-ize us. :)

Twitter: DHMRS
June 30, 2012 at 1:07 am

who thinks that her (or his, I suppose) situation should be my primary consideration, no matter what the topic.


MamaRos August 5, 2013 at 4:43 pm

Just found your blog – LOVE THIS! Keep up the good writing!

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